you say it like it’s a BAD thing.

so…Benny thinks I rock.  which is cool, since there’s not too many times in one’s life that you are actually told you deserve an award…

It may be a I Picked Your Blog Award, also known as the NosePicker Award, but it fits me.  no, not because I pick my nose, but because in receiving it, I have to talk about me.

And let’s face it, this blog is all about, well, talking about me.  Or things I find funny.  More ME.  Or how others make ME feel.  See the pattern?  

mememememememe

There are these rules that I have to follow.  Not that I am a huge rule follower, but when it comes to surveys or making lists of little eccentricities, I am all kinds of ho-ish….  (if you read this, then you already know it.) 

I have to list a few of my obsessions, which are random and weird…but is that a bad thing, really? 

So, let’s see.

I am FASCINATED with Baggo.  Otherwise known as Cornhole (In Kentucky, Ohio and Arkansas).   Actually, I am not obsessed with the game, because it’s essentially just throwing bean bags in a hole, cut in a board.  But I am obsessed with the American Cornhole Association (ACA) and that there are leagues and t-shirts.  I will find a way to work the word Cornhole into a conversation, especially if I have imbibbed an adult beverage in the pool.   I had hoped I would get a t-shirt for my birthday, but all I got was a stern lecture.  *sigh*

I am obsessed with mail order catalogs.  I love looking through them.  I rarely buy anything from them, but I will get a dozen or so a week and I will actually sit down and browse through them.  Because you never know when you will need ice cubes in the shape of a shot glass or bunion socks.  It’s helpful to know those items are merely a phone call away.

I am obsessed with locking the doors.  I firmly blame my enjoyment (is that the right word) with having the living shit scared out of me and the thought that Michael Meyers or Freddy Kreuger is going to come in through the front door and do me in.  I don’t care if you have SWORN on a stack of bibles that they have locked, double locked and triple checked the locks, I will get my sleepy self up and go check.  again. 

I am obsessed with porn.  Which sounds a lot dirtier than it should.  (I mean, CORNHOLE???  puh-leese!!!)  Not obsessed with WATCHING porn, but that people take it so seriously…they actually have their own version of the Oscars, which I find hysterical that the award isn’t more phallic, like, say, an ACTUAL Oscar which is gold and phallic.  But to admit this makes me sound all pervy and weird.  I find it crazy that these folks are called “actors” and “directors” and “stylists”, because basically, isn’t it just a bunch of folks running around, being, well, porny?

Which brings me to my all consuming obsession, which is just knowing IT.  Whatever IT maybe, I wanna know all about IT.  Thank GOD for Wikipedia!!!  I can spend hours reading, books, magazines, online, references, cross references, whatever.  If IT tickles my fancy, then I will read and read and read.  Alas, being a mommy doesn’t give me much time to think about IT or what IT is or where IT is going…but when the mood strikes, I will stick my nose in IT and not move until I get my fill of IT.  (is it me, or did this sound alot like dirty-ness?)

So for the three readers I have left that aren’t related to me after the last two admitted obsessions, thank you for sitting through this weird walk through the maze that is my mind.  It’s a tricky minefield to navigate, but at least I am a unique party guest, yes?

OH!  I need to tag and forward said NosePicker Award so the weirdness can march on…

Ursula(not so)Proper   – I am STILL waiting for new material!!!

Queenie’s Place             – This chick rocks!!!  And there is a drink in Florida with my name on it, according to Queenie.

Boobs, Injuries & Dr Pepper    - if for nothing else, the title alone.

Steam Me Up Kid     - I actually had drink come out my nose laughing at this blog!

I find me sorta interesting…

I got tagged and posted this on Facebook a while ago and seeing as I am a survey ho and not all of you are my friends on Facebook or MySpace, I will post it for you to peruse…

Once you’ve been tagged you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under the tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) Then click publish.

1. I am left handed. I turn the paper sideways, so it looks like I am writing up and down instead of left to right. It used to bother me when people called it weird. Now, I think it’s cool.

2. I am an Alpha Male to the ‘nth degree. I am loud, brazen and agressive. Which is a complete contradiction to the me of my adolscence. I was timid, passive and a wallflower. This is confirmed by the lack of folks that remember me from high school.

3. I don’t subscribe to being a vegetarian, don’t try to convert me.

4. I lost a friend of over 10 years for choosing Barack Obama over John McCain. Sadly, I would make the same choice again if presented with it.

5. I lost a close friend for choosing to love a girl instead of a boy. I have never once thought of it as my loss. I got the love of my life in exchange for it….

6. I am not as smart or as funny as I want to be. But I am much more so of both than people give me credit for.

7. I plan to move out of the state of Texas once my son graduates and live somewhere where I know no one and see if I can start over.

8. I put my past behind me and didn’t pick it up until I got connected with MySpace and Facebook.

9. I don’t need a label for who I am. If you need to label me, that’s your hangup, not mine.

10. I don’t appreciate the octave warbling voice scales that Aretha, Mariah, Beyonce and Christina feel the need to put in every song.

11. Nor do I appreciate anything Aretha Franklin or Beyonce.

12. The national anthem gives me chills everytime I hear it. And I place my hand on my heart everytime I hear the Pledge of Allegiance.

13. Snuffalumpagus was the most underrated character on Sesame Street.

14. I find humor in the concept of porn. That people find it a “career” or that there’s plot, directors, wardrobe or sound tracks… I can strike a joke about it anytime…

15. I will stop whatever I am doing to watch Ever After, Transformers, Notting Hill or Because I Said So.

16. I can still do a cartwheel.

17. Resevoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction are amazing. Quentin Tarantino is a genius.

18. Taking walks with my son made me learn to appreciate rocks in a whole new light.

19. I wish I had been as cool in high school as my daughter is now.

20. I am a HUGE believer in karma and am borderline superstitious. But only because I don’t remember all of the superstition rituals necessary to be fully superstitious.

21. I am really proud that I have started and kept up with my blog.

22. I am a really good cook. Specifically, I can rock Italian dishes, Mexican dishes and all things breakfast.

23. I love thunderstorms. At night is my favorite.

24. I believe all things look better by candlelight.

25. I would walk through fire for my family….they know who they are.

Interview ME!

I got this from Ursula’s blog yesterday and decided to tempt fate.  Ursula is WAY too smart and I am lucky that she still tells folks we are friends.  I feel infinitely cooler just knowing her…

So I commented her back on her post, and asked for 5 questions, fearing they would lead to really smart questions that I would look like a buffoon answering or I would need to quote Wikipedia, Google AND Yahoo, just to make it through…

Alas, she has been thoughtful and given me 5 questions that I can dig into…so here…

The Rules:1. If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” (And your e-mail address, please.)
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

 

Your Questions:

1. Do you think there is any hope that The Respondent will ever get it right and start being the father his children deserve?

Sadly, this question doesn’t have a happy answer.  No.  I don’t think so.  I used to have faith that he would but he is too angry with me, to own any part of the demise of our relationship.  In his wine soaked logic, in hurting the children, he is hurting me. 

I have finally come to the conclusion that the great father that I THOUGHT he was, was due almost completely to the fact that I made it easy for him to BE a father, I did all the heavy lifting for him.  He sat back and was merely IN the house…I can’t recall a single time he made the effort without me showing him the way.

 
2. You’ve just won $10 million in the lottery. What are your first five purchases?

I am going to tithe, not that it’s a purchase, but it’s the first thing I think of every time.  So the purchases….

1.  First, I will purchase a will and every legal document I need to ensure that Whirly, my kids and my family are taken care of and my fortune is protected.

2.  I am actually going to purchase 5 college educations.  Well, set up trusts for 5 college educations.  I am collectively count this as one.

3.  I am going to purchase a home.  Where I want, exactly how I want.  It’s going to be warm and inviting and on some land.  So when I need to, I can welcome folks to a safe place…

4.  I am going to purchase a home for my mother.  Where she wants, as long as it’s not too close to me….teehee…just kidding mom…calm down…she is going to have her own space, and not allow anyone to take it from her ever again. 

5.  I am going to purchase my sister a home.  She need not worry about a house payment hanging over her and struggling to give my niece a comfortable life.

The rest, well the government will take care of most of it, I am sure!!!

3. I’ve heard arguments, on both sides, from the gay community regarding gay marriage. Some say they want nothing to do with being pigeon-holed into a hetero institution and others, of course, are demanding equal rights. What is your opinion of gay marriage and why?

I was raised believing that marriage is a union between man and woman in the eyes of God.  And for me, that dogma sticks.  Marriage is one man, one woman. 

This makes my relationship tricky with Whirly.  I am more committed to her than I have been to anyone else.  EVER.  And I feel married to her.  We are a partnership, we co-parent, we have a joint account, and we make family decisions together.  We do all of it, isn’t that what a marriage is? 

I think I deserve the right to have equal rights under the Law of Man.  I don’t need the government to tell me whether or not it’s a sin.   That’s the Law of God and I will deal with that when I get to the pearly gates. 

4. What is the best day you ever had?

Mustang Island, three years ago; on a beach with my family, laughing playing and building sandcastles.  It was a sense of peace I had not felt before.  I still dream of it. 

 

5. I feel very lucky that Aleah isn’t one of those girls that gets too involved in teenage drama – she’s so self assured. But she’s only human and I worry that, as she gets older, she might fall prey to all those awful teenage angst… not having the right labels or being part of the right crowd or falling for the “you’d do it if you loved me” line. What were your biggest worries as Maggie entered high school and were they warranted?

My biggest worries for Maggie were the same ones our parents had for us.

            Drugs, Sex, Peer Pressure, College, Teen Pregnancy…

There are new drugs (Cheese, which is Heroin & Tylenol PM) that are available for lunch money.  There are now elective classes for Parenting and the girls stay in school until their water breaks.  Peer Pressure has taken on new levels as the kids are now looking for an “instant” good time and they get bored so easily and want to move onto the Next Great Thing.  And College is a pressure that most kids only deal with their senior year.

My fear was that Maggie would fall in with the wrong crowd and succumb to these pressures.  I have found that for the most part, Maggie has kept to the straight and narrow.  She has developed her mommy’s love for party life, but she keeps a much more level head than any photo op may lead you to believe.

I know that Aleah is in good hands and has a great support system.  My only words of advice are to talk to her and to keep talking to her.  Get to know her friends and talk to them.  Sometimes it pays to be that “cool” parent, the one they can talk to.  But keep the mommy hat close by!!!!

They are my kryptonite…

To know me is to love me.  And those on MySpace know I am a survey freak!  I love them.  I will make them up, I will answer them and I will post them.  I think I am funnier and quippier on them than I probably am, but in StephieWorld…I rock!

So, I have a couple of blogs I check daily, Ursula’s, her fellow statesman, Bennyor from down south, Queenie.  It’s usually my morning break in the day…and I am giddy when I get to read a new post, because these three make me laugh…sometimes OUT LOUD!!!

So imagine my glee when I find that Benny posted a survey this very morning!!!  Why, is it my birthday already?!!?!?!?!  whoo-whee…

To honor this fine tradition, (and I was called out!!!) without further ado, I give you, the 2009 Getting To Know You.

(Benny, please, PLEASE, keep the cheesecake and don’t give to Pogo!!!)

1.  What is your occupation right now?

I am an AP Manager for a convenience store/gas distribution/wine & beer retailer company. 

I sit in an office with no windows, like a veal, for about 10 hours a day.  Hi-evah, I like what I do and after 20 years, I am pretty good at it, if I do say so myself!

2.   What color are your socks right now?

as it’s 30-effin degrees in said office, I am wearing tan socks.  Wishing for a second pair, hell, a third pair right now.  I think it’s warmer outside!!!

3.   What are you listening to right now? 

Solsbury Hill by Peter Gabriel.  On my playlist….previous song was Escape (Pina Colada Song) and next is What Have I Done to Deserve This by Pet Shop Boys.  Ecclectic much?

4.   What was the last thing that you ate? 

 

oatmeal with honey.  yum.  trying to stick to the damn diet…

5.   Can you drive a stick shift? 

I can drive it in first gear.  no matter how hard the engine whines at me, I can’t be coordinated enough to change the gear, let off the gas and hit the clutch.  I can walk and chew gum though.

6.  Last person you spoke to on the phone?

El Chief-a, the Boss Man.  Wants me to cut another check…what do I look like, an AP Manager???  jeez!

 7.   Do you like the person who sent this to you?

Benny rocks!

8.   How old are you today? 

I am proudly 38 1/2 years old.  I have earned every moment of it.  Although the thought of turning 39 freaks me out so much more than turning 40….haven’t figured that one out yet.

9.   What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? 

Until four years ago, it was boxing.  As I am a boxing NUT!!!  Alas, Once Whirly became my girl, boxing is not the sport of the hut any longer.  It is, in order order of my new favorites Basketball, Football, and Golf.  I watch boxing when I get a hall pass from the other three and I gotta tell you…DeLaHoya shouldn’t have even gotten in the ring last month.  But I love the Klitschko boys…

10.  What is your favorite drink?

hands down, Schlotsky’s Raspberry Lemonade. 

11.   Have you ever dyed your hair?

The question shouldn’t be have I EVER dyed it…it should be what color HAVEN’T I dyed it.  when your mom is a hair stylist, you end up being a guinea pig more times than not…I have been permed, dyed, highlighted, cut and sprayed more times than I care to count.  Now it’s just how I like it, long, shiny and dark brown. 

12.   Favorite food? 

Sushi.  Tex-Mex.  Chinese.  Seafood.  The four basic food groups.

13.   What is the last movie you watched? 

Ghostbusters II.  And I just realized last night that Bobby Brown is the guard at Gracie Mansion!!!!

14.   Favorite day of the year? 

Thanksgiving Day

15.   How do you vent anger? 

I clean.  Seriously….if the place looks like a sterile laboratory…turn, walk back out the door and run….

16.  What was your favorite toy as a child?

My sister.  Seriously.  I would dress her up, drag her around, feed her bugs, lock her outside…what’s not to love?

17.  What is your favorite season? 

The Indian Summer.  That time, right between end of summer and start of fall, when it’s sunny and warm in the daytime and brisk in the evening…I can sit outside for hours with Whirly.

18.   Cherries or Blueberries?

cherries.  Dark bing cherries from Farmers Market…

19.  Living arrangements? 

I live with the daughter, the son and Whirly.  More times than not, there are additional teenagers, preteens, and extended family brimming from the seams.  and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

 
20.  When was the last time you cried?

I got a bit teary watching the last 5 minutes of 8 Seconds last night.  Shut.it.  As a former Rodeo-Girl…I remember it.

21.   What is on the floor of your closet?   

shoes, a receipt that I dropped this a.m.  and some of my bags.  (Ima bag lady!)

22.   What did you do last night? 

It was Taco Night at the casa.  So I fed the family +1…

 

23.   What are you most afraid of? 

Rabid, over the top Republicans.  Fred Phelps, Ann Coulter, Sally Kern, Rush Limbaugh, my ex-husband….you know the type. 

24.   Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? 

cheese with spisy mustard, plain.

25.  Favorite dog breed?

I am gonna say Border Collie mixes as my last two rocking dogs were that breed.  Although  I miss my two labs, Alice and Renee all the time. 

Although, the son comes in smelling like a wet dog after a day in the sun…can I call him my favorite?

26.   Favorite day of the week? 

Thursday is the new favorite.  I am quoting a friend “Thursday holds the promise of the weekend to come.” 

I like that…

27.   How many states have you lived in?

I currently live in a state of bliss.  But I have always lived in Texas.  Before I die, I plan to live in another state, just to say that I can…

Since Whirly’s family is in Michigan as is Ursula…methinks Michigan or there close is in my future.

28.   Diamonds or pearls? 

funny enough…not a big bling girl…oh, who am I kidding…a great big shiny diamond will look quite nice on my finger.

 
29.   What is your favorite flower? 

I love daisies.  All kinds of daisies.  For my birthday a couple of years ago, my sister sent me a bucket FULL of white daisies to work…it is still to this day, my favorite arrangement!

I love Peonies, but it’s too damn hot in Texas for them to survive so I have only received them once.  They were beautiful.

 

Well, now that you have all this information, whatever will ou do with it???

Back to the grind…